Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
