I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
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