He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
