My hand turned me down
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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