I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
