i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize