wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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