Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
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