I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
