But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Randomize
