I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
