i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
