And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
