we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
