he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
