I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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