did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
