I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Randomize
