The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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