whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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