Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
