what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
