ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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