i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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