thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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