is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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