if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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