why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
the liver wants what the liver wants
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
