We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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