Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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