Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Randomize
