absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
