i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
