trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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