If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
