i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
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