Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize
