he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
