LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
