ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
