Swine flu. Run for my life!
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I need to sanitize my soul.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
