Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
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