I don't think brook has ever known best
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
