Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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