jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
