Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
you had me at cake vodka
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
