who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
