I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
