I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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