I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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